I finished out one blog today, and was immediately led to another…that kind of had to do with the same thing…my time…and creativity…and things I WANT TO DO!

God, I so WANT to spend the remaining time I have in life…being creative!  Perhaps that’s a little…arrogant…of me, but at least trying to be creative from my perspective.  Spending my time doing all those things I WANT to do, instead of just spending my life doing things I have to do or that other people want me to do.  Opening my mind to the millions of possibilities of life!  Thinking and writing and drawing and coloring and building and making…whatever comes in to my mind!  Doing what I want to do.

I suppose the case could be made, that “who says that doing what you want to do is creative?  I guess I could agree with that…depending on what someone wants to do.  But just for the sake of argument, let’s say that doing the things in life that one really wants to do…is creativity.  Of course, I know, there are always those who would pervert the purity of doing what one really wants to do.  So we have to define it, and qualify it and on and on.  What I am thinking of is doing what one wants to do that does not hurt anyone else in any way.  The purest sense of doing anything.   Doing what one wants to do is not pure if it hurts someone or something else.

Some may not even understand that.  They are the ones who have lost creativity completely.  And that brings me back to my own creativity and doing what I would lie to be doing.

As we drove all around to see some of our favorite types of things the last two days, I could feel some relaxing.  I could feel the sparks of creativity fanning up my own flames of creativity again.  I even thought of a new story that I think I would like to pursue…some day….when I get a chance…if I get a chance.

Amazing how I feel the pressure of ‘have to dos’ coming down on me.  A phone call from someone who wants to see our available rental house.  I put them off for another hour, because I wanted to at the very least, finish this thought process.  But even with he extra hour before I need to get up and go show the house, I feel a whole different…feeling…in my body and my mind.  I feel my day, my time, chopped into pieces.  I wonder if I will even be able to get back in to writing after I come back from showing the house.  I had penciled this day in for me and what I want to do.  But one of those nagging HAVE TO DOS has popped up.  I have to show the house because we need to get someone in and get the money flowing again.  The money is important in keeping our lifestyle as reasonable as it is.  Too many months without adequate rent will create a burden on us, especially after spending so much remodeling the one house and being out of that rent money as well.

That actually plays in to this creativity thing anyway.  I was going to write about how my creativity has  been stifled with my job and the other things that HAVE to be done.  All the HAVE TO DOS in life seem to cram creativity back down into the farthest recess of our brains!  You feel a spark of creativity and HAVE TO DOS come stomping it out and dumping buckets of water on to it until there is almost nothing left.

I say almost…because it still has not totally killed me yet.  I still WANT to do creative things.  I still even NEED to do creative things.  With most people…you’ve got to wonder.

It’s getting time that I’ll have to go on over there in the next few minutes.  I think this will end up being a short blog.  Just as well.  I got to zoning out a little earlier and it’s not about the size of the entry anyway.

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